I recently read through a book called The Insanity of God.  It talks a lot about the persecuted church and why God allows difficulty and hardship in our lives. I'm sure it was timely for me- not that I know anything relatively close to the suffering those people have endured- but it was a really encouraging book for me.  It's mostly just stories of people whose faith survived under the most difficult of circumstances.  I highly recommend it.  Anyways- one of the things he wrote about was how many Christians he talked to always talked about how music was one of the biggest things that got them through difficult times.  These last few days many songs have been playing over and over in my head.  Oddly enough one song is from a children's movie about Joseph- it says-

"I thought I did what's right. I thought I had the answers.  I thought I chose the surest road, but that road brought me here.  So I put up a fight, and told you how to help me.  Now just as I have given up, the truth is coming clear."

"You know better than I.  You know the way.  I've let go the need to know why, for You know better than I."

"If this has been a test, I cannot see the reason- but maybe knowing I don't know is part of getting through.  I try to do what's best, and faith has made it easy to see the best thing I can do is put my trust in You."

"You know better than I.  You know the way.  I've let go the need to know why, for You know better than I."

I cannot deny that even as I try to take steps forward- I am very afraid and uncertain. I have been so afraid that I felt like I couldn't breath!  But I have been reminded that it is often hardships, trials and difficulties that God uses to bring Him to Himself.   

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in Thee" ~Psalms 56:3