A friend gave me a book recently and wrote in the cover, "I am giving you this book because there is a heart in Katie (the author) that seems to be in you."

So I began reading the book looking for the resemblance.. and haven't found it yet.  More than anything her faith, her love for Jesus and for people, and her strength in hardships has made me feel ashamed of my self centeredness. 

I am so quick to complain about my circumstances, so quick to feel sorry for myself. I hate to admit it- even to myself, but I think I have allowed myself to think I am giving up a lot.  But as I read about suffering so great that I cannot even understand it.. I realize how pathetic I am being. How selfish.

As the time to leave for Bangladesh approaches, I find myself thinking of things I will miss. Little things- but somehow they matter. Of course, it's the people that really make it painful. But things like running, or coffee, or wearing shorts and a tank top and sitting out in the sun, or independce, or driving- those  things are really hard for me to give up. Definitely not the hardest- but still. And I just realize how pathetic I am. How selfish.

I know my heart will ache in going. Ache for being so far away from people I love. It already does. But maybe it's time for me to be woken up from my self centered life...